I Feel Old

I haven't updated this blog in a while. I know, I say that every time I come back to this thing. The truth of the matter is, I haven't had much time. All summer, I was home with the kids. We did a lot this summer. My Aunt Carol visited for the month of June and she's really into getting out and doing stuff, so it forced me to get out more. We took the girls to the playground more often. I also got a Fitbit to count my steps.

Then last month I decided to become a vegan. I was a vegetarian on and off through my teen years and 20s. I didn't have the right kind of discipline, or money, to keep it up. And when others around you are all "How can you give up fried chicken?", it was easy for me to go back to meat. It's not going to happen this time.

I'll try to update this blog more often now that the girls are back in school. Anneka is in 3rd grade and the twins are in 1st grade. And I feel old.

Doing My Job

I'm trying to write a quick post here to keep this blog up-to-date, but I probably should've done this while the kids were in school.

Eagle Rock, CA

After I got back from dropping them off at school this morning, I came home thinking "I'm going to get a lot done today" and then I promptly fell asleep on the couch. Don't blame me! I had trouble sleeping last night! The husband was snoring, then I was cold, then I woke up to the horrible smell of a skunk! We had all of our windows open, in every room, and there was a breeze. You can imagine what that smelled like! So I got up and started spraying Febreeze around the house, and then I sprayed too much and then that smell started to bother me!

On the plus side, I got the kids to school earlier than usual so they could sit together in the cafeteria and have breakfast. As long as they're getting to school everyday, I'm doing my job, right?

Anneka before school

On top of that job, besides the obvious things I do around the house, including cooking and being their chauffeur, I also get paid to Tweet and I sell various items on eBay.  That's my job, for now. I'm making money, which is cool, and I actually have a savings account with money in it! This might be too much information, but it's all legit. Don't worry. I'm still working for Inside Edition. They call me when they have a story they want me to look into and report on. That's so much fun. I love being on national tv, especially when people text me or send me messages on Facebook saying "I saw you on tv!". I've probably been on Inside Edition more than 10 times now. I've honestly lost count. And then sometimes my feature is in the weekend edition of the show, and then there are times where my segments are for the website. You can always check the website for some of my videos at InsideEdition.com.

Well, the girls just went in their room to play school. I'll go watch Inside Edition and continue to look for opportunities on the web. I'm looking into taking classes for voiceover acting. I asked a friend, Kevin Michael Richardson about where I should go for training. He does the voice of Cleveland Jr. on The Cleveland Show and Family Guy. I do weird voices around the house for my kids, I might as well be doing it for the masses and getting paid!

Later.

Laila before school

Productive Days

So I'm back on track and I have a long list of things to do. In my last post, I talked about distractions and how I was used to working with them in the background. Perhaps I work better under pressure? I do remember back in school when I'd have a test the next day, I'd always forget up until the last minute, then I'd be up at 11 o'clock at night, cramming for it. I always aced it! I just always put off things, and sometimes important things.

Me, hugging Mia while listening to Laila

I've been utilizing my iphone more lately for things it can actually do, besides playing games and Tweeting. I've been using the alarm clock, calendar and notepad. Don't ask why I never really used them before. Maybe because I didn't have super important business before? Now that the kids are in school, I can concentrate on the things I need to do in the house and outside of it. I'm also working really hard on my career, keeping up with auditions, meeting with an acting coach, etc.

Anneka, Laila & Mia

I can't exactly say things are running smoothly. Last week I got the girls to school late for the first time. A whole 15 minutes late! It's strange because I'm always on time! Doctor's appointments, auditions, meeting up with friends, etc. I'm ALWAYS on time. Or early. Actually, I'm usually super early. I've gone to auditions and job interviews with time to kill. I just love being prepared and I hate rushing. I'll try my best not to take them to school late again. Of course, that was a special circumstance because usually Bry helps me get them up in the mornings and we all leave about the same time, with him heading to work. That one particular day, Bry was out of town, taking care of business in Chicago. I barely slept a wink that night before. It was a mixture of Laila's coughing in her sleep, not used to sleeping alone and worrying about my husband being on an airplane.

I was alright, of course. He wasn't gone for long and I got decent sleep the next night. Hooray for me!

Anneka, before school this morning.

I still have things to do tonight, getting the girls' snacks prepared for school tomorrow. I really need to start going to bed earlier so I can have a more productive day. Or maybe I'm being too hard on myself. As of late, I've had a lot of productive days.

Me

My Therapist Says...

I had this plan to try to blog everyday once the girls were in school, but things don't always go as planned. They are now in their third week of school and this is the first blog I've posted in forever. It's been at least a month since I even looked at this thing. But in my defense, a lot has been going on.

By a "a lot", I really mean "not much". I know. I just contradicted myself. It feels like nothing's been going on, I mean. No job, nothing exciting. I'm not doing any stand-up and tv show appearances. I haven't been on Inside Edition in over a month. Not that they don't want to use me or anything, it's just they haven't needed commentary on certain news stories, except one day last week. They called, but I had such a sore throat that my speaking voice wasn't normal. I was barely squeaking out words so I had to turn them down.

The first week of school, I was a little depressed. My twins started kindergarten and Ani started 2nd grade. It was just a reminder that they are growing up and there was nothing I can do about it. At least when Ani started kindergarten, I had the twins to focus on. Now, no one's at home for me to focus on. Except for me.

I started seeing a therapist. She wants me to focus on me. I'm so used to putting other people first, I've forgotten what I wanted. I've forgotten what I came out here to do before it's too late. Honestly, I never expected to be a mom, but I certainly never saw myself as this over-obsessive "helicopter" parent. I drop them off at school, then stand outside of the gate watching them in their respective lines. I dress all three of them alike everyday. I'm overly worried about if the twins are making friends and if their teacher is paying attention to them.

Focus on me? That's kind of a joke, right? Yes, I now have hours in the day where I can have a full thought uninterrupted, but what else am I supposed to be doing? I've been making money by Tweeting for major brands. I buy stuff cheap then sell them on eBay for profit. That's my business. That's what I've been doing to bring extra money into the house. But I haven't done stand-up in months, I haven't been on any auditions, and I haven't even been keeping up with this blog.

My therapist says I'm too hard on myself. She's right, I know. I put a lot of pressure on myself to do certain things and if I don't succeed, I kick myself when I'm down. This week I've felt much better about things. Last week I was sick and kept the girls home a few days because they were sick too. I spent those days laying around, taking medicine and eating very little. I lost a few pounds. This week, I'm reassessing and making myself "do". I have all of this time to do what I moved my family out here to do. And there's this voice in the back of my head that's sing-songing "Don't screw it  upppp". Well I'm telling that voice to FUCK OFF.

Was this entire post one big, long ramble? See...I'm still being too hard on myself. Don't tell my therapist.

If My Eyes are all X'ed with it...

Writing sketches and commercial parodies for my Second City writing class.

This class is like a dream to me. Comedy writing is so much fun.

Yes, all of these sentences are incomplete. Well, not that last one. Or that one.

I'm, like, really tired, dude. I don't even know why I'm sitting here trying to update this thingy. I just feel like I have to be writing something, to stay in the habit. Even if the writing is sophomoric and incorrect. Then am I really getting somewhere?

I had someone read my script for "Hello Again". He loved the first 30 pages. It's important to me that he really likes it. He's a real actor. Not like my bullshitty self. And that's not me feeling down or low, because I am quite the opposite. I just know that I spend more time writing than acting. But in my defense, I was in a play...2 months ago!

I created some new characters for myself. Lisa and I are talking about filming each other's sketches. She actually finished the Second City writing program so her opinion is important to me. And she's talking about directing my film. Now if real actor boy really wants to do it, then I'm finding funding fast! I will do what my girl Tiffanie Debartolo did and keep trying to someone wants to make this damn thing! And I promise, it's a really good script. It really is. I did actual research while writing it. Now if real actor boy reads the whole thing, loves it, says he has to play the part, I might die over...x's for fucking eyes. But what will that do? Can't make the film if my eyes are all x'ed with it...

But he said he had already read the first 30 pages and he was totally in. So tell me to stop overthinking it. Us women overthink a lot of things. Plus, I'm a writer. Writers overthink things. Plus, I think I'm intelligent, and I'm a dramatic person, so those things on top of those other things makes one huge over-thinker.

Okay, this was longer than I expected. My allergies are itchying at my eyes. I'm blarging to bed. I have to walk Ani to kindergarten in the morning. Still can't believe my baby is old enough to be in real school.

Later gators.

I Didn't Cry...I Held it in!

Busy week!

My oldest daughter started Kindergarten this week. No, I didn't cry like a little baby and embarrass her. I held it in, thank you very much.

I walked her there this morning while Bry got ready for work and stayed here with the twins. Then, I drove with the twins to go pick her up this afternoon. Yes, I missed her yesterday and today.

Right now I'm trying to figure out if I should be letting the twins color at the same table while Ani does her homework.

Not a good idea. I sent them to their room to watch tv for a little bit and lay down. They didn't protest too much.

Going to go help Googa with her homework.

Laters!

Busy Sunday

Okay, so I didn't practice my stand-up routine today. Nor did I do yoga. But in my defense, I did get a good amount of exercise today. We went to a farmer's market, which was hot as balls. But we got a lot of free samples of fruit, which the girls thoroughly enjoyed. Then, we went to our favorite bookstore, which was fun! I sat there reading books to my girls, then looking through a tabloid magazine, I mean, uh, reading Tolstoy! Yeah, that. Something intellectual. Yep.

Then we went past Justin Bieber's favorite restaurant. No, he wasn't there. Dammit. I mean, shut up!

Then we drove through downtown L.A., which we hadn't been to in the 5 months we've been here. We decided to just drive around and look at the area. Yeah, weird. It kinda felt like downtown Chicago, but it wasn't. Then we ended up near MacArthur Park. Is that area supposed to be bad? Because I'm from the ghetto in Chicago, and that area really didn't seem that bad. Maybe because it was daytime? I don't know. It didn't look great, but I certainly wasn't scared. I said to Bry "let's get our asses back to the valley, we don't know where we are", so he pulled out the gps. Not a great idea to just drive around L.A. blindly, not knowing what certain areas are, with your 3 little girls. I would hate to get stranded in a bad area or something!

So we ended up back in Silverlake, at the Trader Joe's, and I got a gay equality bumper sticker from a guy standing outside, passing them out. So, yeah, today was pretty sweet. And yes, I'm tired as hell, but there was a new episode of "Breaking Bad" on tonight! Uh, hello, kids are in bed, time to power up that DVR!

Later Gators!

I have to register Ani for school tomorrow. Ugh. I'm dreading this. I'm real nervous about my baby starting Kindergarten. Future me is screaming, "Angie, she will be fine! She needs this! It's your problem, not hers!" Lol. Yeah, my problem, not hers. She's really excited!

Fascination

Hmmm...so what am I up to...?

I'm still fundraising for "Dead Oliver". We're still in pre-production and thinking about who's going to play the role of Oliver. In the meantime, it's not too late to donate to get an IMDB credit as a producer! www.indiegogo.com/deadoliverfilm

Also, I'm trying to find a yoga or pilates class nearby. I really wanted to go to Winsor Pilates, but that's all the way in West Hollywood, which is like, 45 minutes on a good day. It's probably better to work out closer to home.

Oh, and I register Ani for kindergarten next week. I'm nervous. It's going to be really hard being away from her. She's a great kid. I'm just going to miss her during the day. She's my oldest, and yes, she's 5 and she's ready to be away from her mommy at least some of the day, but still...I'll miss her. At least the twins will still be home with me.

Oh, and I've been totally obsessing over Marilyn Monroe! Obviously, I've always known who she is, and I've seen several of her kids, mostly when I was a kid. I saw "Niagara" and "Some Like It Hot" as a kid with my mom, but more recently I've seen "The Seven Year Itch", and I just want to watch it over and over again! I'm totally obsessed! I get the fascination with her, now more than ever. Why was she that gorgeous and talented?! How was she even human? My God. Then Bry bought me the Life magazine tribute to her. I'm going to go visit her grave next week. I'm going to put flowers. God, I love her.

Oh, and don't forget to follow me on Twitter!
www.twitter.com/angelinascene

Plotting the next steps...

So I've been in Los Angeles almost 2 months and I've done more than I thought I would, but still, I feel like there is more left to do soon. I did get out here close to the end of pilot season, true, so I'm not going to be starring in some  hit show in the fall. Besides, I have no agent, no manager and know close to nobody in town. That's okay though. I'm just sitting here thinking about what I need to be doing between now and next pilot season. I need to go do some stand-up at the The Comedy Store and the Laugh Factory. I need to do some short films or student films to get more experience and pad my resume. I need to do more theater, no matter how scary it is. I need to do a commercial or two! Commercials pay really well usually, and L.A. rent is way more than Chicago Ridge rent! Lol

What I'm trying to say is, I always feel the need to push myself. If I think I'm doing well for 5 minutes, I develop new standards of what "well" is defined as. For example, I moved here, auditioned for one play and now I'm in a 8-week run at a theater in Hollywood. Yeah, that's a big friggin' deal! But I want more! I want more plays! I want to be busy nonstop. Sitting still is not good for me. Sitting still allows me time to think, and for an over-thinker like myself, that's just too much not good!

So in the meanwhile, while I save up for more acting classes and register Ani for Kindgergarten and the twins for Preschool, I'll be sitting here, writing, and concentrating on the play I'm currently in. Oh, and plotting the next steps! I think I might have the whole rest of my year figured out! This plan includes acting, directing and pilates! Mama needs to lose the rest of this baby weight! This is just getting ridiculous now. I'm going to start lying to people and tell them I just had the twins just so they feel sorry for me! LOL

Later.

(Yes, I realize I didn't put the 's' on laters. I'm trying something new!)