Tuesday, October 9, 2012

"Give it a Go, Right Right": a sketch



Okay, so for those of you who know me, or follow my blog, you know that I've been taking a writing class at Second City in Hollywood. Actually, I started taking improv and acting at Second City in Chicago, and now I'm in Sketch comedy writing here. This is a sketch I wrote and was acted out in class this past Sunday. Oh, and keep in mind, they all have very thick British cockney accents!:


NBC ANNOUNCER
Coming to NBC this fall...for
those of you who love Downton
Abbey and Dr. Who, comes the first
British sitcom, written by
Americans, for Americans! “Give it
a Go, Right Right!”

INT. MIDDLESEX LIVING ROOM -

Grandmum, her daughter, (Mum) Katherine, and her husband
(Dad) Cedric, sit in the living room.
Grandmum is in a big dirty armchair. Mum and Dad are on
the couch.
MUM
I could eat.
DAD
You could eat?
MUM
I could.
GRANDMUM
I could eat.
DAD
You could eat?
GRANDMUM
Right right.
DAD
Right right.
MUM
Right right.
GRANDMUM
Give it a go, then, love.
MUM
Right right.

ANNOUNCER
From the writers of “Gary
Unmarried”, “American ‘Coupling’”
and “100 Questions” come “Give it
a Go, Right Right”, starring Chase
Masterson as Cedric Middlesex!
Ashley Haverbrook as Victoria
Elizabeth Middlesex, American soap
opera actress Haley Townsend and
as the family matriarch, Gladys
Flannery, as Grandmum.

Cedric and Katherine’s teenage daughter, dressed in all
black and a skull cap with her hair in her face, comes
into the living room and throws herself down into her
mother’s seat.
She has on a Beatles t-shirt.

VICTORIA ELIZABETH
What? What’s everybody gawking at?
DAD
You going out then, love?
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Huh?
GRANDMUM
You going out?
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
What?!

Mum walks back into the room.

MUM
Anybody wanna go for some bangers
and mash?
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Ugh.
GRANDMUM
I was thinking ‘a eating up on
some fish and chips.
DAD
Fish and chips?
MUM
I got bangers, I got mash!
DAD
Bullocks! Fish and chips!
MUM
Bob’s your uncle! You lazy bum!
DAD
I’ll box your ears, right I will!

She throws a cookie at Cedric.

DAD
You throw a biscuit at me?
MUM
I threw a biscuit at ye! Be bloody
happy I didn’t throw the tea with
it!

She looks at her daughter.
MUM
You get up alright, then?
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
I’m up, I’m up.
MUM
Go on then. Get dressed, right?
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Right right.

Victoria Elizabeth doesn’t move.

MUM
Victoria Elizabeth Middlesex!
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Right right!

She gets up.

DAD
Put on some nice trousers, then.
GRANDMUM
No one turned on the tele!
DAD
You turn on the tele!
GRANDMUM
You turn on the tele! I can’t find
ye clicker!
MUM
You lazy bum. Always sitting on ye
bum!
DAD
What I gotta do to see the bloody
quidditch game?
MUM
Turn on the tele then! Find the
clicker, right right?
GRANDMUM
Go on then, right right?
MUM
Give it a go, then.
GRANDMUM
Give it a go!
DAD
You give it a go!

Victoria Elizabeth comes back into the room, wearing a
nice pair of trousers and a British flag sweater on.

VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Right right?
MUM
I like those trousers!
DAD
Right right!
GRANDMUM
Right right! You going out with
your mates then?
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Yea, I’m going out with me mates.
DAD
Where ya gonna go then?
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Muse concert. Then to Picadilly
square. Then to Trafalgar square.
Then to, uh, see the queen? I need
me some quid, mum.
MUM
Quid?
GRANDMUM
Queen?

The dad looks around.
DAD
Uh... Blokes?
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Blokes??

Victoria Elizabeth looks confused for a moment.

VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Oh, yeah...blokes!

They all look awkwardly at the camera.

NBC ANNOUNCER
Because Americans are really into
British stuff, “Give it a Go,
Right Right”!

GRANDMUM
I used to hang out in flats with
me mates and me blokes. And we’d
snog and shag til dawn!
MUM
Mum!
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Grandmum!

Dad laughs.
DAD
Right right!

Victoria Elizabeth looks disgusted.
GRANDMUM
The blokes were arse over elbow
for me in me day, (slight southern
accent) I reckon...

Realizes she’s gone into a slight southern accent.
They all look awkwardly at the camera again, as if
waiting for the NBC announcer again.

DAD
Uh...Big Ben. That’s there, uh,
here, right?
MUM
(also slipping out of
her accent for a
moment)
So is Notre Dame!
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Uh...oh bugger!

Mum and Dad nod in approval of her choice of British slang.

GRANDMUM
The tele...we can watch the
Olympics! Woo! London!

They all shake their head in disapproval.

NBC ANNOUNCER
“Give it A go, Right Right”! From
the Producers of “Samantha Who”,
“Andy Richter Controls the
Universe” and “Mr. Sunshine”!
MUM
I thought you were gonna go out
with that bloke, Phillip Charles
Upton-upon-shire! The bloke from
Hobbiton??
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
I don’t know.
GRANDMUM
You should give it a go!
DAD
Give it a go, then, love!
MUM
Give it ago!
GRANDMUM
Give it a go!
VICTORIA ELIZABETH
Right right.

She leaves.
They stand there, looking awkward.

NBC ANNOUNCER
“Give it a go, Right Right”...only
on NBC...cause we’re still tryin’,
folks.


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