I had fun with my 4 year old princess today. I was in a mood, didn't want to sit in the house, but I didn't want to take the twins anywhere. Hubby was saying "Let's just get out of the house" and I really didn't want to take the twins anywhere. Don't tell them I said this, but they've been real grumpy all week, not taking naps, or taking turns taking naps! One day, Mia naps, Laila stays up, the next day, Laila naps, Mia stays up. You know what that does? That makes for a sleepy mommy, especially because sometimes I would doze off once I got all three of them in the bed. Ani rarely ever naps, but she lays quietly in bed, sometimes drawing on her drawing board, and I can get in maybe 30 minutes of sleep. 30 minutes of sleep sometimes is good enough! A power nap!
So anyway, I come up with the idea of taking just Anneka out, then remembered that Jontynise said she was going to take her kids to the movies to see The Smurfs. I looked up the movie times, then asked Ani if she wanted to have a day where her and I just go and do something. 20 minutes later, she was dressed, I was in the shower, and I got excited!
Keep in mind, I don't know what it's like to have 2 kids, barely remember what it was like to have 1! With her, it's easier, because she's almost 5! She can put on her own shoes, doesn't cry about wanting stuff all the time, and I can have real conversations with. At the same time, I felt guilty. I thought about Mia and Laila, who decided to take naps today, were going to wake up and look for mommy and Ani and find out we went out to have fun without them. Do I honestly have to feel guilt about everything I do?? What is wrong with me? Sometimes I know the guilt is good to have, if you're doing something wrong, guilt keeps you from doing it again, or doing worse! But I felt guilty for just taking Ani to the movies! The twins would not have sat still for the movie, and I know that, but still.
Nonetheless, we had a good time, went to Starbucks, shared a Tazo tea dealy, went to Wal-Mart, played with the toys, saw kitties at Petsmart, then went to the movies. She was awesome. We ate popcorn, drank fruit punch, hit up the bathroom only to get to the door and realize it was pouring balls outside! So much rain! Drenchy-typed rain! I said to her "It's only water. Like a shower". And made the lady next to me with her daughter laugh. I considered letting her run, but she had on a pretty sun dress with dress shoes and white socks. Yeah, oh, and the parking lot was FLOODED! I had on leggings, a t-shirt, my purse and my pink converse. What did I do? I put her tall, heavy, skinny but size of a 6 year old, self on my hip, told her to look down and put her arms around me, and we went for it. I unlocked the van from a distance with the key remote, and just ran! I got soaked, she got soaked, rain water was all in my eyes and mouth! I threw her into the van, got in behind her, slammed the door closed, and we both started laughing hysterically!
I think I really needed that. Things have been stressful and tense around here. All this dissonance and discord going on in my household about who's doing what and when are we moving and if he really wants to move...it's really stressful. Our lease is up October 31st, so it's time now to be on it. Packing, looking up apartments out there, putting money away...all of that.
But today, we had fun, then I got home and played with the twins and kissed at them and Ani gave both of her sisters big hugs and kisses before bed, which melts my frickin' heart. Best kids in the world.
This blog originally going to be about me finishing The Hunger Games books...but I'm still mourning the end. I mean, I wish there was more to read. It became such a part of my life in the three weeks it took to read all three books. I'll blog about it another time.